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I am being referred back to therapy and I am pretty determined to stop skipping appointments and working really hard this time round.

It’s the 5th (or is it 6th?) one I am seeing. Okay, I think it is the 5th.


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Train and bus rides are really important to me because that’s the only way I get some sleep. So I guess I don’t really hate taking an hour an 40 mins to get to school.

I am so tired I shiver in class and I really don’t know what to do.

I don’t know if my refusal to take the medications are causing all those problems I am facing. But I really don’t want to still be depending on those meds to make me feel better. And it isn’t as simple as not wanting to swallow those pills, but I can’t. Unless someone force them down my throat, I will not take them.

But I truly believe all is going to be okay.

It just may take a while.

Birthday wishes to heaven.

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And so I turned 21 on 28th July.

It’s December.


Work ended, school started. Treatment ongoing.

That tug of familiarity.

“In the end, it’s not the changes that will break your heart, it’s that tug of familiarity.”
― Jennifer E. Smith, The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight

It is crazy how July just flew past.

And I turned 20.
Just like that.




1 free from outside control; not subject to another’s authority
2 not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence
3 capable of thinking or acting for oneself
4 not connected with another or with each other; separate

A hundred and twenty eight.

I can’t believe it’s June, can you?

Turtles All the Way Down


I just finished watching Awake (it only has 13 episodes) and I loved it! 😀


100th Day.

I was a kid who would have tears filled up in her eyes during classes because I thought I couldn’t see my parents for the rest of the day. And I got through the day feeling so scared even though nothing bad could possibly happen.

Now, I won’t even get to see her after school, the next day, next week.

I won’t ever, for the rest of my life.

Anyway, today’s the 100th day since my mom passed on. Yup.